"I haven't fallen off the wagon. I was walking funny in the airport because my hip hurts. They told me I was drunk. That's why they didn't let me on."
-- Former England star Paul Gascoigne, long troubled by alcohol problems, after Air Malta officials refused to let him board a plane to London because they deemed him intoxicated, reportedly because he also smelled of liquor and was slurring his words. Gascoigne was in Malta to take part in a charity game, in which he played 20 minutes. (The Sun)