By Pete Huryk
Invariably as I talk to players, there are usually complaints surrounding coaches. I’m sure that the players believe the gripes are legitimate. This is aperfect opportunity to use your focus and circumvent things you can’t control.
First of all, think of the things that you really want in a coach. Think of the attributes in your idealcoach, not the outcomes.
Do you want a coach who gives you playing time regardless of your skill or attitude? Do you want a coach who gives out equal playing time? Do you want a coach whoblasts you for mistakes or talks to you calmly about issues?
Once you’ve identified the characteristics that you want. Figure out where there are differences between the ideal and thereal. Then figure out what you can do to influence a change.
If your coach is a yeller and it has a negative effect on your play, find a calm and quiet moment to talk to him about thesituation. Pointing fingers and complaining about the situation creates separation and doesn’t fix anything. Even after trying this attempt, it may not change his demeanor. You can only controlyourself. So when you get yelled at, change your perspective, hear the words but not the intensity. Or possibly only listen during his calm moments.
In the end, you are trying to become amember of a team and the coach is simply the director of that group. Focus on your contributions to the team without thought of reward.
Selflessness will get you farther than selfishness.
(Pete Huryk is the author of “FillYour Boots: A Personal Guide for the High School Player,” from which this was excerpted. Huryk has coached at the college, high school and youth levels. Presently he serves as the Director ofDevelopment for SoccerSmith of New Jersey. He blogs at www.hurykunlimited.wordpress.com)
Very good suggestions.
If you have issues with a specific coach, you can always change teams if you don’t like that one coach. But if you’ve “bought in” to a club, you’re likely to experience a different coach every 1-2 years. This wouldn’t be a problem, except that clubs don’t hew to a philosophy of play or commitment to “development”, so you might see-saw from PossessionCoach to KickAndRunCoach. If you want your kid to learn Possession, there isn’t one club in our large market (Cal-N) that promises (and delivers). It’s all about Making Your Child a Complete Person, blah blah blah. And the ratio is about 20 KickAndRunCoaches for every PossessionCoach.